Insecurity will destroy you

If you want to be successful in today’s world, you better be confident enough to cope up with this fast improving society. You may say you are good enough but deep down you may be the victim of insecurity. The first step in this direction is to accept this fact and after that we are here to help you gain that confidence back whether it is about you as an individual or it is about your relationship. Some of the tips that might help are:

10. Don’t Ignore:

Ignoring problems doesn’t solve them. If you feel the traces of insecurities in you, just face it. If you feel the problem with your partner instead of waiting for the time when he/she would adjust to that or there comes a big storm try to solve it. Mocking out would definitely worsen it. If they have some insecurity try to find out the reason behind that and let them know that you care. And if you are the victim then you should better start thinking why you have the insecurity and then take the complimentary actions and set the wrong things right.

9. Talk:

Talking can be the problem of every solution if done in the right way. Talk more about your problems to the one who cares and who would care enough to listen. Who knows you get the solution to your problem. If it’s about your partner even then talk to them that you know what is going on in their mind and you have noticed the changes. Make them feel comfortable enough to show that side of themselves. You would get to know about them more and they will feel they have you no matter what. Try to help them with whatever that is bothering them. May be you can prove to be a life saver.

8. Don’t give up or give in:

It’s fine if you are irritated because of the insecurities, it is human. But what you need to do is to try to find out the solution for your problem and never ever give up. Giving up would do no good. And if it is your partner who is feeling insecure than it is must that you try to make them feel better but in no circumstances you should give in. You are no dummy and you can’t keep changing yourself because of their insecurities. Don’t let the insecurities win over. Instead stay firm and remain who you are. Tell them that you are not okay with it and make your point clear. It would prevent any further misunderstandings and you can’t just keep on modifying .

7. Dig it out:

‘You have a problem go to its root.’, ‘In the core of every problem lies their solutions’; these all are not mere statements. To find the solution to any problem you need to get to the bottom of it. So think about it. What could be the reason of your insecurity? And when you know the problem you got the solution. If it is about your partner then I would say talk to them more about it. Let them spell it. Find out what happened that you have negative thoughts about yourself that caused this insecurity. May be that past experience is no more important in your life and you may be able to get over it.

6. Remain Busy:

This may not be the particular solution to this problem but you can’t ignore the fact that the more you stay free, the more negative thoughts you have. And negative thoughts would cause insecurity. So why not remove the factor completely. Keep yourself busy enough to avoid any negative thoughts. Indulge yourself in good things whatever you like. If you find out the insecurity in your partner then I would suggest the same to you also. Keep her busy. Take her out, make her feel special and needed and don’t give her time to think of anything else. Girls the same applies to you.

5. They are not Experts:

You have a best friend that is good. But you know what..! Even that person is no perfect human. So instead of taking advices from them think and help yourself. It doesn’t mean stop sharing things or stop listening to others. It simply means if your friend is saying something that you are not okay with, you better listen to yourself. If your friend has a failed relationship because of some reason doesn’t mean you would face the same. You two have different partners, different personalities and different conditions. So you better start using your own brain before its too late.

 

4. Trust:

This is the prime important factor in any relationship. Trust your better half if you want to be trusted too. Give love if you want love. You can’t just keep on looking into their personal stuff or mails or their cell phone. They have a personal life of their own and don’t ever try to sneak into their personal space. You may be out from their life also by doing so. Respect their feelings of privacy. Don’t be the detectives and find out the details about them until it’s too important.  You would be creating misunderstandings only. Instead trust them and strengthen your relationship.

3. Some principles but no scratching out the scrap:

Set some ground rules and don’t break them usually. Decide them by mutual discussion and happiness of both. You and your partner both had a life before this relationship also. So why let that life die. May be it was the life your partner loved. Set some principles that could be a day with friends in a week or may be a movie in a week together. But when they are out with their friends don’t envy that or doubt that. They are loyal don’t worry. You should not try to dig out the things to a level that makes them uncomfortable. Like if they said they went out to a bar, don’t try to force them to tell you every detail of it. And if there is a small issue between you too, try to solve it instead of creating a scene over it.

2. Self-Confidence:

Nothing attracts a man or woman more than self-confidence. So stay long and confident. If you will keep on thinking about the things that you lack you would be the victim of insecurity for sure. If you are lacking something, try to figure out what and work on that. Work to improve yourself and your confidence as a result. If you think your dressing or your looks or the way you present yourself in front of others is not good enough, work to make it better. If you will keep on thinking you are not good enough for your partner, you would never be. If you will keep on thinking your relationship won’t work, it would never do. So think positive and improve.

1. Stop Comparison:

This is the biggest problem that causes insecurity. You must keep one thing in mind ‘Nobody is perfect’ and ‘You have your own qualities’. If you will keep on comparing yourself with other people who say look better than you or who have a better life than you (as per your thinking) then stop doing it. You don’t know anything about their life and you can see their qualities only. Try to look at yourself and see what you are good at. Everyone is born with some qualities. So stop feeling inferior. You are best and no one can replace you. You should in fact think about the things you can learn from that person and improve yourself.