Long ago, there was a time when the
women of the house used to stay indoors and the males of the society were
supposed to do all the outdoor activities. With time changed the cultures and
the thinking of the people and thus began the modernization.
Now, women are as free and independent
as the men of the society. They work like them, sometimes even better; they
never stopped taking care of the families in the process. They should be proud
of themselves and a sense of pride should be there. But is it pride? No, it is
fear.
Fear: fear of eve teasing, of getting raped, kidnapped or murdered. We, the women may have succeeded in changing
the culture of the society but the society has failed us. Here I don't intend
to say women are always the victims or victims are always women. My intentions
are to focus on the fear that persists in every woman’s mind that doesn't allow
her to feel free.
When a girl is born in our society,
parents want to be happy for an Angel has been born, but with that is a fear,
for her safety, for her wellbeing. They are marked the 'burden' the moment they
are born. A mother will have to constantly worry about her daughter now. A
father has to protect her from the wild creatures that may exist in her
surroundings. A brother has to take care of her and be her bodyguard wherever and
whenever possible. She truly is a burden who will make all of their lives hell
at some point.
Then there comes a time, living all
those years, listening to how unsafe it is for a girl to go out, a girl doesn't want to go out anymore. Even if she does, she has this constant fear, of what
may come next to her.
When she walks on the street, she
hopes she is not getting stalked, when she's in a vehicle she puts all her
faith in the God hoping that the driver won't turn out to be some psychopath.
She has made up her mind in a way that when she’s safe, she thinks she is being
pitied upon. When she reaches back home after work safely, she feels like she
has survived another day as if she was in between the starving lions.
She may be tagged free, strong and independent
but the truth is: she is not. She can't wear what she wants to, to avoid those
penetrating eyes; she can't go out once its dark, to avoid any mishap. She
can’t even opt for a better career option that involved living in a city all by
herself, all alone, to avoid any bad thing remotely possible. All her decisions
involves thinking about it twice, once to find out the impact on her
parents(Society) and then to identify any kind of threat involved(If she’ll be
safe!). About her choice, her happiness, she can’t give it a single thought.
A million such examples can be listed, million cases have been reported.
She is not strong; she has lost her
ability to trust. She has to analyze everyone to look out for any wrong
indication, which in turn controls her from speaking her mind. Is she free when
she has to look out if the colleague who is being friendly is there to help or
is a trouble. She has lost her freedom.
She is not safe in her office, or in
her own house, or on the streets. Where is she supposed to go where she won't
need to live in that constant fear!
How can she be called independent when
she has to rely on a male to go out and return safely? Truly said she is a
burden.
She has to sacrifice her own life
because her parents want to give up the ‘Responsibility’ and make her someone
else’s tension(Burden). So, she gets married. She has to sacrifice her career
because she won’t be safe away from home. So she stays at home, learning to
cook when the people who should be grounded are those monsters who consider her
just another THING, just some OBJECT.
She is being punished for being a girl
when the criminals roam around free, targeting their next victim.
One thing I don’t get is, if a person doesn't have the sense of what is right and what is wrong and who can get
involved in such a crime, why does the criminal get to go free? Why the girl is
claimed embarrassment and she is the one to kill herself? Why does the society
punish the victim again and the criminal just enjoys the freedom, one step
closer to ruining one more life.
Why does a girl have to live like that?
If men in the society could just stop acting like a villain here, she can be
happy too. I am not asking men to do anything for the POOR ladies, I am just
asking them to not do anything. Just let us live our lives in peace. Let us say
what we want to, let us live how we want to, If we won't have any
murderer/rapist/stalker around us, we won't need to live like anything can
happen to us the next minute. We don't
ask for your help, we just don't want trouble from you. But this could be a
slow solution, so until then you, the good guys, can lend us a hand too, to
fight for our safety, as we are your sisters, wives, mothers or friends.
I am not in a place to talk big or
curse what's wrong because whatever bad is around us, a part of us is guilty
too. We should have spoken earlier. People have been speaking, we should have
listened. But now when the water is over the head, we gotta do something. Let's
just stop tolerating the wrong, let's try to do the right thing here.
We want to feel safe again, we want to be free again . We deserve a safe society, we deserve respect.
Women - Unite for your own safety.
Today it may be for someone else, tomorrow it could be you. Men - Fight for
your ladies, for you family, for your nation. Do the right thing. Unite for a better future.
